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The Gospel in Bed

*This post written some time ago was one of the most popular from my old blog. I’m still rejoicing in salvation!

I’ve experienced Gospel power in bed. If you’re bold enough, read on.
It took me years to get used to sleeping with somebody. I’m a Type A driver, hard-wired to push hard, work late, and sleep little; and beset with a sin of self-love that still lurks within my un-chiseled forty-year-old bod. For reasons unknown to me, except that perhaps God may have designed it for my sanctification, I am one of the world’s lightest sleepers and, once awakened, wide-eyed for hours. People who sleep hard used to tick me off.

My wife sleeps hard.

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Growing Kids God’s Way – Not Ezzo’s

Here is a re-run of something I wrote four years ago. I still hold to my main concerns. One of the problems with Ezzo-ism is that it is abusive to the parents! Abused people often become abusively hyper-judgmental of other people, particularly parents who don’t apply the same measures of discipline to their children that they believe is right. They need healing.

This poor mother needed healing. Such is the nature of Ezzo’s abusive system that crushes parents under unrealistic expectations. It is abusive to make a mother feel guilty for her motherly instinct.

There is a lot of thoughtful criticism out there for the Ezzo method, but I will simply enumerate a few more things with little to no explanation:

1. It is shortsighted. It turns every skirmish of the will into Armegeddon. We are seeking to make disciples who are pursuing the will of God; not robots crafted to perform our will. A long view is better than fomenting a tempest in a teacup for the sake of winning the battle of the wills.

2. It is traumatizing to both child and parent, psychologically abusive to parents.

3. It incites parents to pursue dangerous ambitions in every discipline scenario (i.e. ‘breaking the child’s will’), a tactic that even God, the All-knowing Father, does not pursue with His own children.

4. It results in children being shaped into — and pressured to become — trophies of their parents’ control skills.

5. It masks the reality of human nature and the Doctrine of Total Inability.

6. It breaks the spirit of children, turning them into pleasers who are rewarded for conformity while denying them the richness of authenticity and the reality of Divine power to do what is right. (This applies to older children, of course.)

7. It damages both parents and children by encouraging them to believe that leadership is control and promotes in them a mind that instinctively think of a God that will bring down the hammer of His discipline on the slightest infraction. It capitalizes on the the feeling of guilt.

8. I personally think Babywise in its effort to avoid the evils of child-centeredness (and is child-centeredness always evil?) gives suggestions that ultimately promote selfish parent-centeredness. Get your lazy butt out of the bed and feed the child when its little body says it needs it.

In short, I think parents who start looking for short cuts in the hard work of making disciples are beginning a dangerous journey that will prove to be longer, more painful, and ultimately disastrous.


“Seven years. . . seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her.”


It’s her golden birthday today. She turns seven on the seventh.

For seven years now my wife and I have praised God for closing her womb. For seven years now we have been rejoicing over the many years of barrenness that preceded March 7, 2001. For seven years we have been blessing God for our infertility. For seven years we have been relishing the fruit of our affliction. Our daughter is our Ephraim: “God has made us fruitful in the land of our affliction.”

On our children’s birthdays we think of precious barren couples and fervently hope that they will be strengthened by our story. A Mother’s Day never passes that this pastor does not publicly pray for the barren woman.

For seven years we have become more perplexed than ever why we should have been chosen to be so blessed. “Blessed is the man whom Thou choosest” (Psalm 65:4). We will never be able to comprehend why, of all the barren women in the world, God chose to make this verse Jennie’s testimony:

“He maketh the barren woman to keep house; and to be a joyful mother of children. Praise ye the Lord” (Psalm 113:9).

A birthday is a praise day for Jennie and me. It’s a remembrance day.

This happy day is tinged only by the sad reality that many couples silently suffer barrenness and that thousands of babies needlessly die by the hand of the abortionist. Our joy is dampened only by the fact that so many people still think that adoption is only Plan B, failing to see that it may be God has designed it to be Plan A for their most unexpected happiness.

The following is a piece I wrote for a National Sanctify of Life Day and published on my blog some time ago. It’s the story of when we first held our daughter seven years ago today.

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